Primary Genre(s): Horror, Young Adult, Mystery
Published: 6 October 2015 by Simon Schuster Books for Young Readers
Page count: 384
My Format: Audiobook via Hoopla
Would I recommend it: No
Commission Link: Buy The House
My rating: ★☆☆☆☆
Gavin tells Delilah he’s hers—completely—but whatever lives inside that house with him disagrees.
After seven years tucked away at an East coast boarding school, Delilah Blue returns to her small Kansas hometown to find that not much has changed. Her parents are still uptight and disinterested, her bedroom is exactly the way she left it, and the outcast Gavin Timothy still looks like he’s crawled out of one of her dark, twisted drawings.
Delilah is instantly smitten.
Gavin has always lived in the strange house: an odd building isolated in a stand of trees where the town gives in to mild wilderness. The house is an irresistible lure for Delilah, but the tall fence surrounding it exists for good reason, and Gavin urges Delilah to be careful. Whatever lives with him there isn’t human, and isn’t afraid of hurting her to keep her away.
Where do I start? I have only read one other Christina Lauren collaboration – Josh and Hazel’s Guide to Not Dating – and I really liked it. This book, however, is awful. I hate to put it so bluntly but it is bad. I almost didn’t review it to be honest, but I made a decision that I would review the books I read whether I liked them or not. Honest reviews right? Here are my pros and cons for The House:
- I am very sad to say that I cannot think of a single thing I enjoyed about this book.
- This book is exceptionally juvenile. I don’t even think teenagers would buy this story.
- It is overly sexual for YA in my opinion and the sexual banter between Gavin and Delilah was incredibly childish and naïve. If some guy had said he’d like to bite me when I was a teenager I would have thought he was a psycho! Plus the love connection between Gavin and Delilah happened in about 3.2 milliseconds and was incredibly unbelievable.
- The characterizations were very one-dimensional.
- I’m not buying for one second that Delilah would just accept the “quirks” of the house when she found out about it. She also wouldn’t have kept it secret. Completely unrealistic!
- I’m also not buying that no one in Gavin’s life has ever needed to contact his Mom! School? Neighbor? Old friends? Anyone? I am just not buying that the kid would be left to his own devices for that long without someone investigating.
- Nothing is remotely scary in this book.
- This honestly read like a weird, angsty, teenage threesome where one of the three “individuals” in the relationship was a house. Seriously.
I can’t recommend this book. I honestly don’t even know why I finished it. I don’t think I’ve ever read a more unrealistic, unbelievable, and unlikely story in my life.
I even checked to see if this was perhaps the first book written by the authors (Christina Lauren is a pen name for the collaboration between Christina Hobbs and Lauren Billings) but it isn’t. I really wanted to give it some leeway for a first effort, but alas, I can’t even do that. I’m glad this wasn’t the first Christina Lauren book I’ve ever read, because based on this I would never read another one.
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(image from Goodreads)